Random update
Hello everyone,
It's been about 1.5 years since I have posted an update on my story. Nothing serious has happened as far as my condition, but I have deteriorated in strength and ability over this time.
I also think that after the last embolization surgery that I had, it caused some kind of minor brain damage. I have had a difficult time concentrating and my short term memory has been exceptionally worse then before. I also feel like I have to struggle more then I used to, to complete a thought or have a conversation.
I took several IQ tests after I figured out I had this problem and was scoring 20 points lower then I used to. Before the seizures, I had an IQ between 130 and 144 on multiple test. I was not able to score higher then 122 and have not been able to score higher since the last surgery. Very frustrating to lose some of your intelligence.
Because of these problems I was never able to catch up on my work and it continued to fall behind as did my bills and finances. Eventually it lead to me losing my home and business. I now live with my mother because I don't have a choice.
As for my current health, I can't do anything for an extended period of time. (more then maybe 60 minutes) before I need to relax and stop. I still have random episodes of problems that come and go, but I have learned to realize when they are and aren't seriously bad. I spent a lot of times previously in the emergency room because something would happen and I would panic.
My symptoms with numbness, weakness and clenching are worse then they were before and I might possibly be slowly deteriorating into further disability. My symptoms never stop and they are extremely difficult to ignore. They have taken a major toll on my stress levels and I'm generally an unhappy person because of it.
I am fighting with Social Security to get my benefits because I need to be able to get some kind of relief for my symptoms. Medication or doctor visits or whatever it takes! They denied me and I'm now in the appeal process. I have been learning a lot about what I need to do to properly appeal my case and get the benefits I deserve, but it still is a big pain in the ass. They need to help me while I can still somewhat enjoy my life at my age before something bad happens again.
Living with other people is stressful and difficult at times and I simply can't afford to get away. Once you've had a place to call your own, living with other people is never going to be satisfactory again. Unfortunately there's nothing I can do about it without compounding my medical risks and dangers. Without Social Security, I don't think I will ever regain independence.
I'm alive, miserable and unhappy, but I'm still trying to get what I need to live. I want to live, but if something ever happens to me where I'm quadriplegic, then I will have no desire to live my life that way. If I can't get help with benefits and medical treatment for my symptoms, I also have no desire to keep living. I have been suffering too much and too long and if they don't recognize my problems then to hell with it all. I will give it some more time, but I don't know how long I can go.
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