Hi Traci,
I'm sorry to hear about your son and your situation. As one who experiences a Spinal AVM that cannot be cured, I understand and sympathize for others in similar situations.
You certainly can claim SS disability. It is a long process, but worth it after acceptance. I did a small documentation of my SS experience here:
http://spinalavminfo.com/forums/gene...-security.html
I'm not sure what kind of comfort and support that I can offer, but my views on life are probably a bit abstract compared to most. I believe that life is what it is and you can only do what you can do. Anything that happens from that point is beyond control, and should be accepted as how it must be. I don't think it's possible to move forward otherwise. Take comfort in knowing you've got what you have now and that you're doing everything you can.
Best of luck.
~Steve